Trying The Couples Counseling NY Professionals Suggest Can Save A Struggling Relationship

By Christine Bell


Living in a committed relationship can be difficult for the two people involved even though they love each other dearly. After the wedding, reality sets in. As individuals evolve, they change. Each one will have significant life altering experiences. Without either noticing, a couple may drift apart until they are living separate lives. If you are experiencing this, the couples counseling NY professionals offer could put you and your partner back on track.

There are signs that you and your partner might need help getting through a difficult time. Sometimes a couple has trouble communicating with one another in a positive, meaningful way. One partner can feel disconnected and isolated from the other. Sometimes there are secrets being hidden that are driving a wedge between the two.

A counselor won't do either party any good unless both are willing to give the process a chance. Listening carefully and responding thoughtfully, is a start. You can speak your mind as long as you take care to be respectful. Hostility and defensiveness, on the part of one or both partners, is rarely helpful unless the counselor can assist the parties in getting to the core of the negative feelings.

Many couples have trouble communicating effectively with one another after the birth of a child. This should be a time of joy and sharing, but it often becomes a time when the partners begin to resent one another. Women are often overwhelmed by the sudden responsibility of caring for a newborn. Men sometimes feel like they are being left out of the picture.

Couples contemplating divorce should consider talking to an impartial third party before making a final decision. Talking to a counselor doesn't mean you won't decide to go through with the divorce. It often gives couples a chance to discuss what got them to this crossroads and whether they believe the relationship could be salvaged under the right circumstances. If not, as least they will communicate more effectively going forward.

Once couples have settled on divorce, it may not seem like counseling has a function. This is not always true. It can be difficult to persuade a partner to seek counseling at this stage, but it can be helpful if there are children in the family. When couples make an attempt to cooperate with one another and remain civil, the children will benefit.

Divorces are not easy on children, no matter how congenial the parents try to be. Kids can withdraw or lash out. Their grades often suffer. Running away is not uncommon. Counseling can be a safe place for children to talk about their fears and anxieties, in the presence of an nonjudgmental adult who will keep their confidences. Combined parent-child sessions can also be productive especially if the adults are willing to listen to the child.

A lot of times it is easier to give up on a relationship than to fight to maintain it. Couples sometimes need an unbiased third party to work out the difficulties. It is not a sign of weakness to ask for help. It is a sign of inner strength and maturity.




About the Author: