3 Inspiring Plans You Might Try To Get Your Ex Back

By Karli Ralston


Coming up with a plan for how to get back together with your ex can be difficult work. You struggle with what you should say and what you should do until suddenly you come up with a brilliant idea. Even though you think that you're unique or that your plan makes perfect sense, all of us have come up with the same ideas at one point or another after a breakup. We all searched for that elusive key that will bring back the love that we lost.

If any of these plans sound familiar then you are perfectly normal. This doesn't mean that any of these methods will help you to find success in getting back together with the one you love but there is hope. We all have to go through stages after a breakup. The stage that you are in presently was visited by many. We all come out the other side of this process better, stronger and, if we are wise, we are able to get back together with the one we love. We all get that opportunity. It's simply a matter of when and what you wish to do with that opportunity.

Now, logic might tell you that the best way to convince someone that your point of view is correct would be to discuss the topic. This might lead you to believe that talking with your ex would be the perfect way to win them back. Simply give them a convincing argument for why you should get back together and they will surely see your sincerity and that life would be better if the two of you reunited. This is also what couples therapy is all about. If it's good enough for other couples then why wouldn't it work for you? Conflict resolution is the topic and you are prepared to resolve the problems in your relationship. This should help you to get back together for sure.

This plan may not work out the way that you envision though. While your ex might agree to meet with you and talk with you, your motives are different. Your ex might agree to talk with you but only to give you closure or to further explain why they are done with the relationship. You, on the other hand, want to get back together. Until your ex has a desire to be with you, all the talking in the world is only wasted breath. Communication is important in a relationship but your ex has ended the relationship, at least the romantic portion of the relationship. Don't mistake your ex being kind or tolerating you in their life is an opportunity. You very well may find that they lose their patience and completely stop communicating with you.

Making changes in your life or promising to change the things that your ex complained about when they left you is another common solution that we all come up with. We feel that if our ex has given us reasons why they are leaving then we must simply change what they complained about and they will be happy with us again. We could all use some change in our life and we can see the logic behind why our ex left so we decide to take our ex's words to heart.

Again, while our ex might be proud of us for making some positive changes in our life, these changes aren't going to bring our ex back. Your ex lacks the emotional desire to be with us. As a matter of fact, if your ex did want to be with you they would come back even if you didn't make any changes in your life. There are many couples that get back together in spite of terrible circumstances and problems. It is passion, desire and attraction that brings them back together and not changes that one partner made in their life. Changing or promising to change will not bring about that passion and desire, sad to say.

Finally, you might come to the conclusion that if you were simply perfect then your ex wouldn't be able to help themselves and they would be moved to take you back. By simply being perfect in every way, you could charm the socks off of your ex and everybody would agree that you were the perfect match for them. You would write wonderful poetry or send them gifts as a way of apologizing for the past. You would show them how much you love them and your ex would be so moved by your display of devotion that you would break down that wall standing between the two of you and you'd live happily ever after.

This tactic is often even more desperate than many of the others. The only thing that you will probably accomplish is to push your ex further away from you. Your ex will lose more respect for you and if you push the issue, there's a good chance that your ex could file a restraining order against you. Giving your attention and affections to someone that isn't worthy of receiving your love right now is unhealthy. Once your ex is attracted to you again then you can show your love and devotion again. Until that time, being overly nice to your ex after they broke your heart is a sign of weakness.

The true key to your success in getting your ex back is to have them fall in love with you again. You ex needs to miss having you in their life. They need to remember what it was like to be in love with the person they first met. Your ex needs to fall in love with you all over again. That love needs be born anew. No amount of talking, gift giving or change on your part is going to make your ex fall in love with you again. It will happen all on its own. That love is still there. It is simply buried under a lot of resentment, frustration and fear.

Only understanding and time will allow your ex to realize that they still love you. You are actually better off doing absolutely nothing than pursuing your ex at this point. Emotions and love are very fickle and they can change very quickly. Your ex might say that they don't love you anymore or they could even deny that they ever loved you but tomorrow they very well might feel differently. This is human nature and even the most logical person is subject to this emotional swing when it comes to love. Be patient and wait for your opportunity to arrive. Have your life in order and be strong as you wait for things to change before you consider doing anything to try to get your ex back.




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